Not long ago, my wife and I were faced with some soul-searching questions. We had certain plans for our lives, and just as we started actually doing the plans, they suddenly started not working out. It is hard when you’ve been trying to do what the Lord wants of you, only to have it blow up in your face. There was some definite soul searching, and some reflection. The result of this has been that, at least speaking for myself, I still feel compelled to move in the direction the Lord has indicated, but perhaps at a different pace than expected. For me, the thing I feel the Lord wants me to do is write. This was a great passion of mine when I was a teenager and young adult. It’s something that has been in the back of my mind for almost as long as I can remember, but it isn’t something I have always acted on. I delight in thinking up stories, but I don’t always write them down. It does not escape me that to succeed in the field of writing, I have to do a ton of it. It should be something I do daily, and something that is never far from my thoughts. However, I have just a few distractions in my life right now. I have a wife and kids. I have a job. I have callings at Church. I can’t just stop everything whenever I want and write.
Beyond that, I need to know what to write. When I was younger, ideas came easily, or so I thought. I think the truth is that I didn’t vet my ideas all that much. I have storylines I developed that I really like, but I cringe when I notice logical jumps or awkward sequences that really show my youth and inexperience. Now, I’m trying to be more careful. To help with this, a while ago I started a new story. I thought it would be easier to start with something fresh, rather than try to update and fix something I started ages ago. The immediate problem I came up against was that I didn’t know the story. I didn’t know the characters. I needed to get to know them. I needed to be able to see the setting and really visualize everything that would happen. That required a lot of just plain thinking, and I’m starting to understand that is harder than it appears.
The more I think about these excuses, though, I realize they are essentially just that: excuses. I don’t have much in the way of free time, but you make time for what you really want. I know that as I do more writing, it will come easier, and it will become addictive. I’ll want to sit down and get some ideas out. For now, the important thing, it to get moving. I don’t need to worry about getting it right the first time through. That’s what re-writes are for. I’ve also realized that I get to know my characters much better during the actual writing process. I also know that the more I write, the more I will think about it. Then my mind will naturally take use of what I call the “cracks” in my day (driving to and from work, using the bathroom, getting the mail; the moments where my mind is free to wander) to think through my story. I don’t know exactly how this will all work, but I feel like I need to create every day. It’s possible that the creation may be a blog post instead of 1,000 words in my novel, but if I’m creating every day I will write my novel(s). My soul rejoices at this very prospect, so I know this is the path I want to take. I don’t know if I will sprint or crawl along this path, but whatever I do, I want to keep moving.